This is one of those editions where I am unsure what to report (even to myself). No. No, this is not a case of writers block because I know of several topics to discuss; but there season has not come. I suppose it is more of a case of it being September and the there are about 45 days left in the growing season. It is the time of the year when I begin to make guess' about what will fail and what will survive the winter; and yet it is still to early to share those thoughts with others.
Maybe some basic house cleaning needs to be done …
Many of us playing with hosta might assume that the term Hosta is both its singular and plural form of the same word; and we would be content to believe that. But wait a moment your friends and mine at the American Hosta Society (AHS) some time back declared that the correct plural of Hosta was … h o s t a s. Well ok … that seems logical. Using the term Hostas seems to be acceptable. But … then the thought comes running through my mind that wasn't the name Hosta derived from an Austrian botanist named Nicholas Thomas Host? If that is correct than isn't the conversion of Host to Hosta a flux latinization of the name and as such shouldn't the proper plural be … H o s t a e? That's it, we have it now!
"Hold on you whippersnapper! In my day we called 'em plants Hostas so the PROPER plural is H o s t a s e s ! Now get that right sonny!" Now whose gonna argue with that genteel, old, neighborly lady. Nope not me!
So which is the correct plural of Hosta?
I just won't remind anyone that these plants have previously been known as Corfu Lily, Day Lily, Funkia, or even Plantain Lily. In some listings they are still known as such even when the official name for them is … Hosta.
It should be observed that the author thinks this story would be much better served in a graphic comic book format. It would convey the feel of tomatoes falling from the sky, and the stories mad scientist using some contraptions much better. The problem is that the author is by no means an artist! IF your an artist, and can take directions, and would like to take on the graphic work on like this, please speak up. In the mean time I will keep writing. One more thing about the writing task is that each and every Act consists of 200 words OR less. This compels the author's skill at arranging words to convey an image of a scene with concise and precise skill.
Gorgon: Continues to grow briskly with its three new spikes of growth which suggest its diameter for next years season. I am unsure if Gorgon and Vulcan are having a competition for leaf growth! What ever the case may be the growth is welcomed.
Popcorn: The 50º evenings we had a few weeks back has certainly made this plant think it is fall. The leaves look like they have firmly faded into fall, and I have mixed thoughts about what the 90º days will do to it. I may have to cut this back during September before the rest of the hostas find fall.
T-Rex: The scape for the flowers has dried and has been gently twisted off for the season. I think the seasons growth has come to an end. I doubt we will see anymore from this hosta this season.
Vulcan: The last leaves have been sent out on this plant for the season. What was only 6 leaves when It was planted has become a storm of smaller growth leaves establishing it nicely as a round for next year!.
X-Ray: has grown with new smaller leaves at its base. There seems to be an additional growth. This is being watched; maybe a late season flower? Well see.
Xanadu Empress Wu - PP20774 CPBRAF: It would seem that this newly added lovely has adapted, and is sending out its first new leaves; hoping more will come before the fall cutting. Maybe it is joining the contest of leaves with Gorgon and Vulcan?
Those are the high lights for now, Next issue I tell the saga of the Blue Mammoth so that everyone can understand the issues behind that endeavor; and answer the question what do Hosta leaves look like when the first come up!
So you may call me 'Hosta Man Kelley', or a 'mad gardener' or even a 'passionate hosta gardener', but to call me a Master Gardener would be incorrect. Sorry folks.
A man is standing over a hosta garden with a light weight contraption on his head. An evil maniacal laugh rises over the landscape from him ... He turns the device on: “Grow my Hosta, Grow! And take over the world!”
Hosta turn their attention to him; *Nope. Nope, no can do! Can't be done. Nope. Quite impossible, Nope. Nope!*
"Wait a moment - you heard that!?" says the man back.
*Of course we heard that; we hear EVERYTHING! What's more surprising is that YOU can hear US … and understand US!* the hosta respond with some surprise.
"The planmunicator works! Yaahoooo!" His shout is heard throughout the neighborhood. The man performs a jig of happiness. He comes to his senses with an uneasy pause coming about ... in a sightly calmer voice “What do you mean you CAN’T take over the world‽”
The leaves rustle back and forth. Hosta: *We already have!* followed by light, polite giggling between the plants.
An uncomfortable pause settles in … In a bit more cautious voice. "If you can't take over the world then why are you here?"
Hosta: *We've come to take YOU over!*
"Mr K, who was that running down your drive scamming about hosta taking over the world?"
"Nothing to worry about Anna, just Mr. Muir Glen, the neighborhood mad scientist running amok … I think. I have to remind him these are MY plants not his sometime. So what brings your over?"
"I'm nineteen years old and still calling you Mr. K; it's Kelley right?
"Peter will be fine."
"Papa needed silence so he cleared the house out. So I came over to see what you were doing."
"My condolences on the loss of your mother. She was a very dedicated person.
"With 26 children she had her own style of dedication."
"Was just thinking that maybe I ought to send your father a present."
"What could you possibly get Papa that he can't get himself. He probably has as much money as the whole of this town."
"Probably Anna. Don't be hard on him Your father, Papa Bullion, earned it promoting the peace movement in this country."
"True. Our college textbooks have his name all over them. Seems I can't open one without finding his name somewhere in it. Did you just hear something? … "
This months totals are as follows in alphabetical order:
2013 Country Aug
United Kingdom 6
United States 41*
Total Visits: 62
Average Visits per day: 3.88
Information taken from Blogger.com HostasByKelley Stat Page on August 31st at 1:45 CST.
* Adjusted to account for the writer's visits; this has been corrected for future reports to be more accurate.